共に生きる掲示板

I don’t really know who’s going to read this.
Honestly, I’m not expecting much.
But I have to write it down, because keeping it inside is getting too heavy.

My name doesn’t matter. I’m a student at Bright Future International School in Riyadh. When I first arrived, everything seemed normal uniforms, schedules, making friends. A bit boring, but safe.

After a couple of months, I realized something was seriously wrong.

It started small. I’d notice myself thinking in phrases that didn’t feel like mine. Then it was emotions sudden bursts of anger, then complete emptiness, with no reason at all. Like a switch flips. Then I come back, and everything feels off.

At first I thought it was stress. New place, new people.
But it’s not stress.
It’s directed interference.
It’s done by real people military tech teams and intelligence handlers in Saudi Arabia.
I know how that sounds. But once it starts happening every day, you stop caring how it sounds.

There are moments when I say something in class and I feel like I’m not the one saying it.
I walk past certain areas like the far hallway near the sports building and I get this tightness in my chest, like something’s pushing down from above. Not fear just pressure.

I can’t tell anyone.
Who would believe me? The school counselor thinks everything is a phase.
If I told my family, they’d worry themselves sick or think I’m losing it.

If I had known this country lets things like this happen to students, I would’ve never come.
I regret it every day. But I’m stuck here for now.

I’m not crazy.
I just know what’s being done to me.
And writing this is the only thing that still feels like mine.

This is my truth. That’s all I can say.